Category: Parenting

Have you ever prepared yourself to take a test, may be to go camping, buy a car, go to a work interview, etc…? I believe all of us have done it at least once in our lives. I know a lot of people prepare themselves for everything they are doing on a daily basis. I can give you an example. I prepare my work clothes every Sunday for the following work week. I choose my clothing, jewelry, shoes, and I even get my nails done. I just like to have that out-of-the-way, so I don’t have to get up early and struggle trying to figure out what I am going to wear or what needs to be iron. My life is ten times easier since I have been doing this.

Another thing I do is prepare in my fridge what I am going to eat during the week. I use zip lock bags and all of my meats are ready to go with whatever is going to accompany them. Since I go to the gym, I work full-time and I have other things going on I like to be prepared for everything you can think of. Now the big question is, have you ever be prepared to not be prepared?

I have had many things in my life where I have prepared myself and things did not go as planned. However the key is to not stop being prepare for your things but to know how to deal with the things that come your way at that very moment. I believe that is the hardest part and I will tell you why. Your emotions, anger, tiredness, careless mind-set can get the best of you and block your brain and make you make the wrong decision.

I was as prepared as I could be during my pregnancy. When I say prepare I mean I was ready or I should say I was getting ready every day for the past 8 months to get what I needed for my baby. The room had to be ready, painted, had to have a crib, dresser, changing table, etc… I had to be prepared for the arrival of my bundle of joy but to be honest with you I was not thinking to be prepared after having the baby. Let me be more specific. I took all the classes I could think of to be prepared. I took a birth class, I took breast-feeding class, I went to a fitness class, I read the book what to expect when you are expecting, I asked questions to family members and friends who had my best interest at heart if I had any questions, in reality I just tried to be as prepared as I could be for this amazing surprise coming my way.

On May 23, 2018 I went to the hospital because I was feeling a lot of pressure, I wasn’t sure if I was having contractions or not. I was checked and everything was perfect. It was false alarm, I was just having pressure. All I can tell you is that it felt like the baby wanted to come out. I was mentally getting ready just because my plan was to have my baby naturally and from that moment I had four more weeks to go.

On May 25, 2018 I went to my 36 weeks OBGYN-baby check. I was going to have an ultrasound to see the position of the baby. The ultrasound showed everything great. The baby weight was approximately 6 pounds. After getting the ultrasound I was to see the doctor and when my blood pressure was taken was very high 176/98. My doctor did not like that. He was concerned. I was sent to the hospital. Here is where I was prepared to not be prepared. Since my blood pressure was high an ultrasound was ordered. The technician took one for 30 minutes. Towards the end of the ultrasound I saw a face in the technician that I didn’t like and to be honest it scared me a little bit but I didn’t say anything. I even remembered asking her a question and she didn’t answer, she was too much into the ultrasound. Few minutes later after she was done the doctor came and talked to us. He said he didn’t think I was able to deliver the baby naturally, he was very certain if I try in the middle of it he would have to do a C-section. He also said he could induce me and it would take 24 to 36 hours to have the baby and he gave me all the pros and cons and told me to think about what I wanted to do and he will be ready in 5 minutes for my answer. For 8 months I was anxious and ready t have this baby through regular labor and all the sudden my baby wasn’t moving enough for me to have her naturally. Emotions got me, I had to think fast and I had to make a very important decision. I had to do the best for my baby and I decided to have her through a cesarean. At that very moment the doctor told us to be ready that I was having the baby. I was not prepared with clothes, my suitcase was at the house, my fiancé was not ready with his clothes either, they were at the house as well. The car seat was not installed in the vehicle, in so many ways I was not prepared for the things I was already prepared for.

In conclusion think about how to handle things that don’t go your way, always think about the people who is going to affect the most, sometimes you have to make sacrifices for others. It can be family members, friends, coworkers and even strangers. If you are a person who likes to be prepared for everything like me know that things can’t always go perfect but it is possible to get it done in some other way. If you are a person who don’t like to be prepared just because you don’t know how to here I will give you 5 tips:

• Acquire knowledge
• Have a go-to person
• Practice Self-care
• Focus on the light
• Prepare Finances

These tips above have always help me in life.

Knowledge is everything, always have a go-to person that you can trust and count on, I have more than one but in that moment I had my fiancé and my brother. Even though it was my choice to decide how to proceed with my baby I did count on them and their support. Always practice self-care, take good care of yourself, physically and emotionally. Focus on the light, there is always something good at the end of the tunnel waiting for you and prepare finances, you never know when you are going to need money in hard times.

“Life is a song – sing it.

Life is a game – play it.

Life is a challenge – meet it.

Life is a dream – realize it.

Life is a sacrifice – offer it.

Life is love – enjoy it”.

-Sai Baba

God Bless,

Janitza Rivera
 

On November 3, 2017 my OBGYN gave me the wonderful news that I was expecting. Little by little I will walk you through my wonderful journey in this blog. I was so excited about the news that I didn’t know what to do. I have been very physically active, going to the gym up to 5 time a week, being fit is very important to me, so I wasn’t going to let this pregnancy prevent me from doing so unless the doctor tell me otherwise. My first decision was to stay as healthy as possible so I continue to go to the gym as normal.

As the months went on I was very impressed with my progress, boy!, I didn’t get sick, no headaches, no nausea, no vomiting, no pain in fact nothing really, So I was ecstatic and may be I was lucky, who knows. I was always afraid of being pregnant and getting sick specially when is a pregnancy that is not plan. You have commitments, you have to work and continue to make a living and much more. Everyday I would give thanks to God for allowing me to be ok and be able to function at work and for allowing to do my daily activities without any problem. I will tell myself Janitza you have made very good decisions as far as eating healthy as possible and also staying in good shape.

When you are pregnant there are a lot of things that comes to your mind specially when you are 40 years old and consider a high risk pregnancy. I was very diligent in following my doctors orders. Throughout the years  I have been a very fast decision maker. I am a person that knows what I want, how I want it and whether the decisions I make are going to be beneficial to me. During my pregnancy I started making one decision after another, sometimes they came very natural to me and sometimes where decisions that I had to think about for a minute or two. I remember my first decision was to put school on hold for a bit because I knew I would have my plate full and I couldn’t allow myself to be overwhelmed more than what I already was. Another decision made was to not find out the gender of the baby. Let me tell you about that decision I made!!. It was a quick decision to me because I always said to myself If I ever get pregnant I would like to not know the gender of my baby and that decision needed to be respected but it was very hard for so many people like my family members. I know we all live in a world where women want to know, they want to be prepared, they want to be organized and me not being that way didn’t mean I didn’t have all of those characteristics, it was just the fact I wanted it that way, I wanted it to be a surprise. I was lucky enough that my fiancé wanted it that way as well. We were thrilled about the decision we both made but some other people weren’t. Have you ever had to make a decision about something and didn’t make it because of thinking what would others think? Think about it, I think a lot of us do it because we always want to please others. Why? Why do you have to please others before pleasing yourself? Could you take a moment to think about this and tell yourself why do I do this all the time? It is time to be BRAVE, make yourself happy with the decisions you make on a daily basis. I always tell people ” you do not live in my shoes” and that is the honest truth.

In conclusion I didn’t let anyone know the gender of my baby until I had her. I had so many people questioning why I wanted it to be that way and I had so many people who were so happy for me not finding out and doing it the old school way. I was so delighted for keeping my wishes alive and never let anyone crush them. I was so radiant when I was told in the surgery room that I had a girl.

Next time you have to make a decision make sure you let yourself know I am making this decision because is the best decision for me and I should do what my heart tells me to do not what others want me to do.

“Your life changes the moment you make a new, congruent and committed decision”

-Tony Robins